Synopsis: Theon wakes up to Osha’s absence and realizes she escaped with Hodor, Bran, Rickon and their direwolves. Theon sets out with Maester Luwin in tow in search of the boys. Bran’s squad manages to keep ahead of them. In the morning, Ygritte wakes up with Jon’s morningwood saying hey and in their conversation realizes Snow is a virgin. He’s not amused by her banter and they argue as they continue their trek. At Harrenhal, Tywin tries to figure out who killed Amory and begins hanging his men one by one. In his chambers, he invites Arya to eat with him and he talks about his legacy. Arya contemplates stabbing him in the back, but she doesn’t have the courage just yet. Tywin puts together that Arya isn’t the commoner she purports to be. Sansa thanks the Hound for saving her. Xaro vows to help Dany get her dragons back but she’s too upset to care about his help. Alton Lannister returns to Robb’s camp with Cersei’s response to Robb’s message. Talisa asks Robb for more medical supplies. He agrees to bring her along to their next stop to get exactly what she needs. She gets some googly eyes for the king in the north. Jorah returns to Dany after he hears of the slaughter. He asks how he can help and Dany only wants to find her dragons. Ygritte breaks free and escapes Jon, but when he catches up to her, she’s surrounded by Wildlings. Sansa has a nightmare about her attempted rape and wakes up to discover she’s gotten her first period. If the queen finds out, she will be expected to bear children for Joffrey. Shae begins to help her hide it but they are discovered by another handmaiden. Shae chases her down and threatens her not to tell, but when she returns to Sansa, the Hound has discovered the mess. Cersei and Sansa discuss her new status as a woman, and Cersei recounts her history with Robert. She cautions the young woman to love no one but her children.
Alton is placed in Jaime’s cell. Jaime doesn’t remember the distant cousin and as they recount their history, Alton asks Jaime is he has a plan for escaping. Jaime says he does as he beats Alton to death to get the guard to come in. When he does, Jaime overpowers the guard, and sneaks out. Jorah finds the woman with the masked face and asks if she knows where Dany’s dragons are. She asks if he will betray her “again” and he is surprised by the comment. He says never. She says the one who took her dragons is with her now. Dany is with Xaro in front of the thirteen. The Spice King doesn’t care to hear her pleas, but Pyat Pree, the creepy bald member of the thirteen offers his support and knows where the dragons are. They were taken by the king of Qarth. Dany questions the comment because there is no king of Qarth, but Xaro steps forward and says “There is now.” And with that, Pyat’s dupes murder the rest of the thirteen. Dany runs away but Pyat continues to appear and reappear, even after Jorah stabs him. He says Dany’s dragons are in the House of the Undying. Jaime has been recaptured and is brought back to camp. Lord Karstark wants to murder Jaime (Jaime killed his son in his escape) but Catelyn stops him. Jaime is sent back to the stockade. Tyrion and Cersei discuss Stannis’ approaching fleet and their inability to control Joffrey. Cersei admits her relationship with Jaime and that Ned was aware. The men of Robb’s camp get stirred up calling for Jaime’s head. Catelyn goes to see Jaime with Brienne. When he taunts her, throwing Ned’s bastard in her face, she calls for Brienne’s sword. Theon addresses the citizens of Winterfell and presents them with the charred remains of Bran and Rickon as Maester Luwin screams in horror.
Comments: Jaime has become somewhat of hero in later seasons, but still in season two he’s quite the bastard who would murder his own kin for his own freedom. While there’s a certain filler quality to Dany’s plot, the scenes themselves are at least exciting. The mystery of Jorah’s prior betrayal, the magic of Pyat Pree, Xaro’s intentions, it all culminates in some interesting momentum. Cersei and Tyrion’s moment alone might be the closest we’ve ever seen them come to true honesty and affection. She admits to her relationship with Jaime and that she knows that Joffrey is a monster, and Tyrion seems almost sympathetic. If only they didn’t have all that messy hatred between them. Still, it plays well. More than anything this is a brutal show, with brutality in all its forms shown. For that to work, you need the lighter scenes, those with Jon and Ygritte, and a quiet chat between Tyrion and Cersei, and yet even those scenes are filled with such importance. It’s funny how between Cersei’s moments with Tyrion and Sansa, if this happened to be the first show you ever watched, you might think she was a sweet character. Theon’s quest does feel rather pointless, but thankfully we are spared too much time with it, as he soon starts to (royally) pay for his crimes.
Memorable Moments: Jaime’s deception with Alton puts a violent button on what seems like a filler scene. The scenes with the Thirteen turn into a horror flick, and it might be laughable if Pyat wasn’t so legitimately creepy. Catelyn is such a baller and her fierce protection of Jaime against Karstark is yet another example. The shock of the boys’ charred bodies is jarring even if it’s obviously bullshit.
Arya: Most girls are idiots.
Tywin: You’re too smart for your own good, has anyone told you that?
Ygritte: You know nothing, Jon Snow.
The Hound: It gives me joy to kill people.
Cersei: I’m sure you’ll make a point eventually.
Tyrion: It’s hard to put a leash on a dog once you’ve put a crown on its head.
Foreshadowing: Cersei and Tyrion discuss fire reigning from above, which is how they’ll defeat Stannis.
Title: Spoken by Catelyn to Jaime.
Deaths: Alton Lannister and Karstark’s son, both killed by Jaime. The Spice King and the rest of the Thirteen save for (and by) Pyat Pree and Xaro. Two bodies purported to be Bran and Rickon.